Dear B:
I have received your letter and accept retirement from your obligation of service.
When we last met you said, “You’ve done nothing wrong,” and “it was not our intent to harm you.” Also, your most recent letter writes an appreciation for me doing “everything asked of me.” Nevertheless, it puzzles me why you continue harm against my person and for the greater community; Especially since Jesus’ teaching on truth, justice, and mercy is clear.
I asked only to be returned to “good standing.” It was, and remains, my invitation of Reconciliation and a way of repairing the harm done. It is the same Sacrament you preach and I am saddened you chose not to accept.
You reason that married, widowed, or divorced people would not accept a cleric who had experienced the same. Holy Wisdom tells me it is these very people who by their own lived experience of marriage in both grace and the cross; possess the necessary compassion. Just think, …compassionate care.
For the entirety of my 60+ years, I’ve held the belief that the institution “at least” strives to resemble its founder and mission. Sadly, in these past ten years, I’ve experienced much of what “NOT” Christ has called his Church to be. And for this, my conscience will not allow me to be silent or complicit.
My passage of tears has gifted greater clarity, trust, and gratitude in God Alone; as the sole source and arbiter of holiness.
And through this dark night, comes deeper gratitude and consent in Divine Presence and Action as the sole formation of my heart, mind, and soul. My sacramental identity and its service to the eucharistic liturgy and Communion of Souls remain.
So, in this contemplation, the Divine Indwelling, calls out:
“Now, Go south to the road,
…the desert road.”
C’est Fini!
